Day 11 - Separation From Experiences SF

In a previous post I wrote about a point regarding speaking to my uncle and noting that I had ate food soon before there and was starting to feel a bit high but then I decided to make an excuse of being social in that moment to not cut myself out from the conversation and go test and correct. So here in this post I am taking that point and writing out Self forgiveness statements and self corrective statements to assist and support myself in making a change to that pattern so that I live what is best for me in these types of situations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore my health in order to experience a movement of energy within me such as while watching a movie wherein I have the thought to test my blood sugar yet I ignore that thought and refocus myself on the movie or the conversation that I am having instead of separating myself from the experience of watching the movie or speaking within the conversation and testing the blood sugar

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to harm the body and harm my health by allowing myself to ignore testing the blood sugar levels in order to experience something for a bit longer instead of noting the thought that I should test at that moment and stopping myself in the experience of conversation or watching a movie or participating in an activity and then to go test the blood sugar

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rather experience entertainment or a good feeling for a while longer than to practically give myself a `good` feeling through separating myself from an/the experiences and testing my blood sugar

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to neglect my health by staying within an experience of watching a movie or being social while it is apparent that my blood sugar and my health needs to be addressed and considered in that moment, and in this I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that my health must be considered in every moment since being a diabetic does need constant attention and consideration of what factors are going into the bg levels and accordingly needs to be corrected/supported through my self movement to give myself good care

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto an experience within a situation like talking or like watching a movie or being social when it compromises my health and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a relationship with the body where I have been telling it that I am more interested in the experience of something that the care and support of the body

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the consideration that I must test in a moment of experience in order to revel or indulge within the experience instead of cutting myself out of that experience within a moment in order to support the body and myself in/as aligning myself to effective care and consideration for the body within diabetes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not separate myself from an experience in order to check up on the blood sugar and give myself effective care and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to tell the body that my relationship to it comes after I've had a mental fix of an experience of something saying that I prefer the mind over the body which it will respond to

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to correct my relationship to the body by taking myself away from an experience in a moment and going to check the blood sugar to state that I will give more attention ot the body and the health of the body instead of the mind and there experiences there within

I commit myself to when/as I am in a social event or am watching a movie and I am caught up by the experience of that event/situation and there is a consideration within myself to go and check up on the blood sugar because I feel a bit high or I feel something and would like to check up on it, to in that moment of consideration say to the other person to give me a moment while I go and check the blood sugar and then go check the blood sugar or if I am watching a movie to simply go check the blood sugar, pause the movie and go check

I commit myself to changing the body/mind/self relationship through placing health and diabetes as an equal consideration towards everything else and thus removing the point of holding onto experiences and placing experiences as priority so that I am able to give equal consideration to the body and what the body is going through in relation to diabetes and then obviously place that as a point of priority in the moments when it is pertinent that I check the blood sugar and correct any point of imbalance

I commit myself to giving care towards the body and to stop sending it the message that I have more care for the mind and the experiences within/as the mind than the body by giving myself proper and effective care within the point of stopping myself within an experience or moment so that I can go check up on the body and correct any point need be

I commit myself to checking up on the body periodically throughout the day simply by bringing myself back here in awareness of myself within/as the body with diabetes and assess what the sugar is feeling like within the body and assess if the body needs any form of support in regards to hydration or sugar balance and then accordingly do so regardless of what I am doing/experiencing in that moment and regardless of the any physical jobs that I am doing in that moment because what is best for me within the job is to take care of the body so that I can do the job effectively and with minimal negative consequences due to improper management of diabetes through prioritizing another point over the body and the health of the body within diabetes

I commit myself to realigning the relationship with the body wherein I give the body the support that it needs regardless of what I am doing or the experience I am having, in this separating myself from the experiences and moving myself to support the body when needed and in this placing the physical health of the body as priority over experiences

Day 10 - Death and Diabetes

For the most part, death is commonly on the back of a diabetics mind because there are thousands of different pathways to end up with complications such as kidney failure, loss of eyesight, loss of a limb, and neurological degeneration, and it can be something that will plague our lives for the rest of our lives; constantly questioning, wondering, fearing when we are going to die and what is it that I am doing now that may cause complications down the road.

One thing that is for sure is that each of us is going to die one day and we don't have control or a say over when we will die. Tomorrow we may get hit by a car or suffer a heart attack, or spontaneously combust. When we die we certainly don't have a say in whether or not we do in fact want to die at that moment, thus the fear of dying resulting from complications of diabetes is a useless waste of space and a irrational fear that we're keeping.

Diabetes is certainly tiresome and it most definitely has it's drawbacks. There is the possibility of complications of our health. It is possible that we may lose a limb, or get heart disease, or have kidney failure, or become blind but these possibilities do not need to become fears nor do they need to create any anger or resentment towards ourselves for having diabetes. They are possibilities and that's all they need to remain. Focusing on the what ifs and the possibilities is going to be tiresome in itself because we will always have these fears running around in the back of our minds dictating what we will and will not accept or allow ourselves to participate in, or they will start to dictate how we are going to live our lives, meaning that we will become dictators of our lives, trying to control every out come to avoid these fears from manifesting as much as possible.

This brings up another point in relation to these fears and that is the fear of control or the want to have control or the fear of loss of control. We have the fear of death related to the complications that diabetes can bring and then we have the feeling of loss of control of our lives because it is a difficult task to keep the blood sugars stable and, for me, this can easily bring up a lot of anger. For example when I wake up and I see that the blood sugar is high and go into this fear of heart disease and fear that I have no control over whether or not I am going to get heart disease I can quickly become angry that I have no control over these outcomes. Again, we don't have control, we have the illusion of control via injecting insulin and eating right, but in the end of the equation whether or not we have complications we are not able to really decide and/or have control of whether or not we are able to stay away from any complications. We are able to give ourselves the best possible control via injections and eating but it is not a definitive decision upon whether or not any complications will come up. So again to place worry and fear upon getting complications is an irrational fear and wanting to have control over ourselves based on what will or will not happen regarding quality of life is irrational as well. We can only give ourselves the best care that we can in the each and every moment, so if we go low, we correct with consuming a sugar, if we are high, we correct with insulin, doing our best to get the ratio right to not cause any rebounds.

In addition to this I see that there is a fear of self within the whole equation. We fear that we are not taking care of ourselves, fear that we are not supporting ourselves the best way possible. We have a lack of trust for ourselves to

make the right decisions. This is irrational as well because within this we are stating that we are not ourselves and have no control over ourselves. This isn't true. We always make the decisions to live how we live, within and without, so in regards to lack of self trust to give ourselves effective care, simply apply practicality to this situation and give yourself good care. When you are in that mood of hating everything and wanting to destroy your life and diabetes along with it, forgive yourself, breathe, take a moment to step back from the anger/hate towards diabetes and self, and decide in that moment to support yourself rather than to destroy yourself.

In regards to death, we are going to die. We are only able to focus on what is within a moment and be here. This isn't to say be happy and be positive and diabetes will just get better on its own; it is to say that within a moment be aware of what we are injecting, be aware that we have diabetes and are going to need to walk through a lot of red tape to get what we need to support ourselves, be aware of what we are eating, and be aware of what decisions we are making that are not in the principle of what is best for all - considering the body.

Day 9 - Separating Myself From Experiences

Last night was thanksgiving dinner and I went to my uncle's to meet with my family. As we sat around and chatted I started chatting with another uncle of mine and as we were chatting we were eating nachos and dip. As I was eating the nachos and dip I was thinking about what I was eating and that I needed to do insulin for what I was eating and check my bg reading. I did not do that because as the consideration of checking and injecting insulin came to mind I didn't want to separate myself from the experience of communicating with my uncle. I didn't want to stop taking with him and focus on something else which would have been injecting insulin and considering how much I ate at that moment and what I would have been eating at dinner…I didn't want to take myself out of the conversation at that moment, like stop talking and `cut off` the conversation so that I could check the bg reading and inject insulin for what I ate. It took me far too long to bring myself back here from the experience of being with the family and talking so that I make the decision within myself to go check and inject insulin for what I ate and when I did check I was 10.0mmol/l which isn't that high but it certainly could've been corrected before it got to 10.0mmol/l

Another example of myself not wanting to separate myself from an experience in order to take care of myself with diabetes was when I was having coffee with a friend after going to thanksgiving dinner. And as I was talking with him I was having a coffee with sugar added to it and I was considering the insulin that I injected for supper and if it would cover the sugar that I added to the coffee. I decided that the insulin was going to cover the sugar primarily due to the reason that I had left the meter and insulin in the car and didn't want to again separate myself from the conversation, tell my friend that I had to leave for a moment and go check and inject insulin if I needed it, I wanted to keep the conversation flowing, keep up the topic that we were talking about and not create a stop in the experience that I was having. When we were done I checked and I was 11.7 and did 3R to correct the high, but again, I could have caught it earlier if I were to separate myself from the experience of communicating with my friend and bring myself back here with myself and not rely on the experience

This has happened for a while throughout the time that I have had diabetes, where I have neglected myself in order to experience something with people or by myself wherein I will sit and watch a movie and forget about testing at the times of the day that I normally test.

Obviously doing this is not best for health reasons, and it is to understand who I am within the moments where I am neglecting my health for experiences.

I used to fear that other people would judge me for having diabetes and feared that they would not understand me having to prick my finger with a needle and draw blood, and that used to be a reason for myself neglecting taking care of diabetes. It is not the same this time because when I was within the experiences at dinner there wasn't any fear of judgement from another person because they were my family and are aware that I have diabetes, and as I am alone watching a movie or playing a video game it isn't about judgment either, it is more about the experience of the situation from energy and not wanting to pull myself away from that experience in order to test the blood sugar or to inject insulin or to eat food if I am low.

So within this it is separating myself from the experience of whatever I am doing, taking myself away from a movie, stopping a conversation if need be, stepping outside, leaving someone alone for a while so that I can give myself proper care.

In the next posts I will write Self forgiveness on separating myself from experiences and giving proper care to myself without fear of being alone, or fear of conflict, and giving myself what I need to give myself regarding care and treatment of diabetes.

If you're unfamiliar with self forgiveness and the process of self forgiveness I suggest to visit http://lite.desteniiprocess.com and walk the free course that is offered there with free buddy support to give yourself and understanding of what the self forgiveness process is.

Day 8 - Does Managing Diabetes Take 14 Hours a Week?

This post is inspired by a disability fund here in Canada in the time of tax refunds. There is a portion of the tax refund that states that if you have a disability you can get some money back with an income tax return. Diabetes is specifically on that list but it states that in order for a disability to be valid one must be in a fatal state, need constant attention, or with diabetes specifically, it states that the care and support that one provides themselves with must add up to 14 hours a week and this 14 hours must be `tangible`. Meaning that the time it takes me to record the bg results each day, count carbs, test for the bg results must take me 14 hours or more which does not take me 14 hours a week therefore with all `tangible` evidence I nor most other diabetics are able to receive this tax refund for the disability that is diabetes.

This post is about the time that it takes to manage diabetes, the time that diabetics must be aware of themselves regarding diabetes and it is much more than 14 hours a week. Diabetes is something that is on our minds, something that concerns us every waking hour, something that we must factor in within all of our activities, something that limits us from doing what we would like, something that limits us financially. Diabetes is not something that takes 14 hours a week of our life, it takes our entire lives.

Diabetes is a dis-ease of the endocrine system and the endocrine system is the system that regulates homeostasis throughout the body through process of specific functions. The Pancreas is the organ that regulates blood sugar through various processes. In diabetics the pancreas either doesn't or has limited capability of regulating the blood sugar. Since blood runs throughout your body it is going to affect the entire body when/as the pancreas isn't operational and thus diabetics must consider the entire body within their actions, must consider the consequences and affects of all choices that we make in a day and whether or not it is going to affect the blood sugar or affect any other part of the body through/as the movement of blood. Within this there are many times within a day that I/we must keep in consideration our actions, we must decide how much insulin we need based on any exercise that we are doing, we must calculate whether or not we need food before the exercise, we must consider if we have injected our basal rate insulin before we've done the exercise, whether or not that amount of basal rate is going to have `too much` of an affect if we exercise and whether or not it will cause a low. And If we are unsure of all these things, which many of the times we are, we need to expect the `worst`, expect a low, expect a high and always keep food and insulin on ourselves so that we can keep ourselves alive and `healthy`

Diabetes doesn't only affect our health, it affects our lifestyles as well. It affects the choices and decision that we must make regarding our jobs, our education, our relationships, our geographical locations. For example, when I decided to go back to school to get the credits I needed for university; diabetes was my main concern, it was also my main limitation. Since the job that I had has benefits which helps out extensively with paying for insulin, meters, test strips, needles, I needed to keep the job. I had to switch to nights so that I could attend school. If I didn't have diabetes I would've stopped working and focused on school full time, but I needed to have the money for diabetes which meant that it was a limitation on the choices that I was able to make regarding school and further education. I am confident that I am not the only example of this.

Again, within work I must consider so many changes in the day/year/month/minute and calculate what the body needs within that moment because there are a lot of factors that are going to influence the blood sugar, I mean even a climate change from winter to summer affects the rate of insulin sensitivity that I must recalculate each time the weather changes, and even if it is a cold cloudy day within the fall it is going to change and I must calculate that each time that I eat and inject insulin. If the calculations are not correct or if it is the beginning of a season I must be aware of myself within whatever I am doing which means that I must separate myself from the experience of socializing, or separate myself from the experience of watching a movie, separate myself from whatever I am doing within that moment and bring myself back here with the body and check up on it to see if what I have calculated is accurate, see if I am going low, see if I am running high and then accordingly adjust the calculations and make the corrections needed within that one moment.

This process is so redundant that when I asked my endocrinologist if she would `co-sign` or be the representative for myself within the tax refund she said that she would `look` at it, but had high doubts that it would follow through because she has `tried` before with other patients only to have the government deny the request for the disability refund.

Another perspective within this is when I was 14 previous to being diagnosed my life was basically being set out in absolution. Meaning that who I was when I was 14 I was basically going to live for the rest of my life. Who I was when I was 14 was a slacker, I already had the conditioning to be a person who goes out and drinks every night, who only looks for their `next high`. I would have had done `nothing` with my life other than party and indulge in sex, masturbation, drugs, alcohol, I had no aspirations to do anything `worth while` in my life. When I was diagnosed with diabetes all that changed immediately, and my `life` in that regards was destroyed because of diabetes…I am not complaining the slightest about that change. I am grateful for diabetes in that respect because looking at it now, I would not like to have been what I was becoming in those years and am much more `happy`/ satisfied with who I am now.

Just because the tangible evidence of recording glucose readings and testing and carb counting does not add up to 14 hours within a week does not mean that diabetes does not take up 14 hours a week of our life. It in fact takes up out ENTIRE LIVES, it destroys our life for the better or for the worse and we must change ourselves to adapt to diabetes so that we can take care of ourselves, change our diets, change our habits of that which will affect the endocrine system, watch our stress levels, stop ourselves from stressing ourselves out, and each of these things takes time. Consider taking out all sugar from your diet, all things that have sugar in them, bread, milk, crackers, cereals…the list goes on, and managing the reactions that your going to go through by stopping sugar within your diet because you have diabetes. It limits what we can do, no scuba diving because if we go low under the ocean we probably won't be able to surface fast enough to treat the low with food, no sporadic travelling because we must plan everything out before hand so that we know that we have what we need to support ourselves, no living in the woods because we are reliant on hospitals and medications from pharmacies, you get the picture.

It is an absurdity that the government has the audacity to suggest that diabetes must take 14 hours a week of our life in order to receive a financial benefit for having diabetes when the medications and test strips when taking proper care of ourselves are above $500CDN a month without insurance (I've been there). It is absurd that our doctors are not even willing to push this point for us because they find it redundant and a `waste of time`.

Diabetes does not take 14 hours a week, It takes OUR LIVES!

Day 7 - Type 1 Diabetes and Environmental Stimulus

I spoke to my doctor's assistant a while ago when I was getting a check up and creating a new pattern of testing to find out when I am going low at work and how to adjust the insulin that I inject and I asked her about a pattern that I noticed regarding climate. I asked her what is the biological difference within the body regarding summer climates and winter climates because I have noticed for a while that during the hotter months of the year I do not need nearly as much insulin as I do in the winter months.

I noticed that pattern a few years ago but I had to wait years to prove or disprove the theory and it is clear that climate change does have an effect on diabetes.

Diabetes is a disease of the endocrine system. The endocrine system is responsible for maintaining homeostasis which is defined by internal processes that regulate balance when changes in the external environment occur. For example; the hypothalamus is an organ just under the brain that is responsible for much of the regulation signals that occur within the endocrine system. When it is cold outside and the body becomes cold as well the hypothalamus sends signals to the muscles to start moving rapidly (shivering) and for the hairs on the body to stand on end to trap in body heat. So through the change in the external environment (the cold) the endocrine system reacts to maintain homeostasis of body temperate. Blood glucose levels are involved in the same regulation processes.

When I asked the assistant why it was that there is such a noticeable change in insulin requirements through the winter months and summer months she said that it was due to activity. We are more active in the summer than in the winter but I didn't accept this as fact because within the winter I was still working which is a physical job and was getting/doing about the same amount of physical activity that I was doing in the winter months yet still needed a drastic change in the insulin I injected. Another example was a few weeks ago where the air here was cold and I/the body was cold as well. I had to wear a sweater indoors to keep myself at a comfortable temperature and during that I day I noticed that my body wasn't responding `normally` to the insulin I was injecting; it had less of an effect than it had days earlier and again, there was no change in my physical activity throughout those few days. During the day that I was cold the sun came out for a while and the sun was warm so I decided to sit in the sun. Right before I did that I was 6.3mmol/L and I sat in the sun for maybe 20 minutes. After 45 minutes from the first test I started to feel low so I tested and I was 2.6mmol/L so through sitting in the sun and changing the external environment the insulin sensitivity changed and became very effective. The reason this stuck out to me is because I have not experienced such a rapid drop in sugar levels over 45 minutes before.

It is not only about change in physical activity, it is about the changes in the environment as well and how the body must adapt to the changes in the environment to maintain homeostasis. There are a few scholarly articles regarding diabetes and the effects of vitamin D which we primarily get from the sun and how patients who had a deficiency in vitamin D had higher levels of blood sugar and a higher overall A1C.

http://www.naturalnews.com/041052_vitamin_d_metabolic_syndrome_diabetes.html

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3427202/

It is clear here that changes in the external environment will have an effect on the body's ability to metabolize sugars through the production and effectiveness of insulin and without us considering the environment that we are raising our children within it seems that type 1 will continue to be a mystery as to how it is caused. One thing here though is that it is clear that the environment that we are raising our children within is not in harmony with the body because diseases being created through external environmental stimulus such as type 1 is an indication that what we are doing with ourselves in/as this life is not in harmony with life itself.

Without a proper understanding of how type 1 diabetes is being created and the effects of the environmental stimuli on the body, we will continue to create such diseases because we are not living in consideration and care for of/as the environments that we are living in and raising our children within. And without a proper understanding of ourselves within/as these diseases we are going to give misinformation to those affected by it which can cause harm

Having a look at these instances it is clear that the body responds to the external environment and when we are not caring or living within harmony to/as the environment the body is going to react accordingly which results in diseases such as type 1 diabetes. We are not living here with/as the Earth/the body and therefore it is responding accordingly through diseases within and without. So within this we can conclude that type 1 diabetes is a result of our actions on this planet and within our bodies, a result of a lack of care and consideration for the body/the Earth and the harmony/balance needed to maintain `homeostasis` which is optimal operating conditions within the systems of the body and Earth. We are a long way off from getting to that point of harmony as this disharmony is based on the harm that money creates therefore a new economic model is needed, such as the Living Income Grant, to give us the time to give effective care for life here within the body and Earth so that these diseases stop manifesting due to an imbalance.

In the next post I will look at the point of imbalance within the mind and walk points of Self forgiveness on the imbalance within my own mind and body.

Day 6 - The Systematic Creation of Type 2 Diabetes

It is commonly known by diabetics that type 2 diabetes can be easily `cured` or managed through diet and exercise which can then bring up the question, does a lack in effective diet and exercise cause type 2 diabetes?

Type 2 diabetic's pancreases still produce insulin to counteract the food ingested, but it is usually the fat residing within/as the body that blocks or inhibits the effectiveness of the insulin because it makes it difficult for the insulin to transfer into the muscle cells for use via cellular respiration. Fat is the storage place for sugars and not the usage of/as sugars within the body. The muscle cells are where cellular respiration primarily occur, which is the combustion of glucose molecules into usable forms of energy. The mitochondria within cells are the end point of cellular respiration, and if the mitochondria are producing energy and the muscles are where the most energy is needed then the muscle cells will have high levels of mitochondria. If the body has too much fat then the excess amount of fat is going to inhibit the effectiveness of the insulin produced by the pancreas because it is going to have to work through the fat to get to the muscles, because fat is not where glucose can be used.

With that being said we must look at our diet and lifestyles that we’ve accepted to exist within/as through the acceptance of the movement of ourselves within/as this system and the generation of money. Consider someone who works at a desk job 9-5. They will be most likely driving to work where they will be sitting in a car for x amount of time, getting to their job where they will be sitting at a desk for 8-9 hours a day, they will get home and more or less sit down on a couch or chair and watch TV to unwind from the day. Their day consists of little to no exercise whatsoever, and since there is little to no exercise their bodies are not going to be able to use the glucose/carbohydrates/sugars ingested throughout the day and therefore will store the sugars as fats which can be a cause of diabetes depending on the genetics of the individual and the strength of the pancreas, which boils down to genetics. I say strength of the pancreas here because the pancreas is going to need to be strong in order to produce enough insulin to counteract the food ingested, and without exercise the pancreas is going to need to produce more insulin for an equal amount of food.

Exercise is a great benefit for diabetics. It increases insulin sensitivity because it warms up the body which will cause higher metabolic rates due to the temperature. For example, I work a physical job where I will sweat and increase the heat of the body due to exercise. A few days ago I went to the gym before work and the few days before that I had been pushing myself harder at work which will cause a lasting effect of insulin sensitivity for about 18 hours compounded exponentially through the time that I worked hard and I needed 330g of carbohydrates just to stave off lows which means that I needed to inject no fast acting insulin and only needed the basal rate insulin for the day. Those who do not know how much 330g of carbohydrates is, a banana is roughly 15g which equals to 22 bananas over an 8 hour period which is a lot of damn food when you consider it. Clearly it is obvious then that exercise is going to significantly increase the sensitivity of insulin within type 2 diabetics meaning they most likely will not need as much medication or any if at all. Again though the way that we have designed this system and our lives within work and within our home life is not helping the pandemic that is type 2 diabetes at this point in time. That is why I say it is systematically created because we cannot live without money and if our lives are designed to be without exercise because of the methods and patterns that we need to obtain money from then the problem is existent inherently within/as this system that we have accepted and allowed ourselves to exist within.

The other point here is diet. Take a look at the foods that we eat, specifically take a look at the foods the children are fed, speaking from a North American perspective here. The granola bars that are packed in lunches for school, the yogurts that are marketed to children, the cereals that are marketed to children, essentially 80-90% of the food geared towards consumption by children have a high amount of sugar within them. So if the parents are unaware and have not been taught effective dieting skills, diet here means the food that we ingest, not diet in regards to losing weight - then they will feed children these foods and nowadays with the level of convenience through mobile devices and computers and television to be entertained from, exercise is something that is severely lacking in their lives therefore diabetes is and will become more of a pandemic. Similarly in the adult life the convenience of fast food restaurants and the high level of carbohydrates and sugars within the foods and drinks available at restaurants and the lifestyle that one must maintain to generate money will again create diabetes to become more of a pandemic.

The Responsibility for this is distributed among men equally, we are all responsible for the lack of care and consideration that we have given the body and the bodily processes that keep us alive, and are all responsible for the creation of these health problems through our acceptance and through our self interest. There are those that are in power and that have `more` of a `say` of what foods are produced and what foods are marketed such as those within the FDA and other food administrative services whom have had a dictatorship over what foods are available for us to consume. Just as we are aware that the consumption of sugar has large side effects, those whom resign within the regulatory food agencies whom regulate the food available to us and who decide what foods will be available to `us` are equally responsible and are equally aware of the effects of sugar and the increase in diabetes. Since we have trusted those within the food regulatory agencies, there is a point of trust that the food that is provided to us through manufacturing processes is `healthy` to an extent and will not cause health problems that significantly decrease the quality of life. The main thing I am stating here is that the food that we are being fed and the food that we are marketed is, at the moment, a significant factor in/as the design of type 2 diabetes and it is clear that type 2 diabetes is not being considered by us living within the systematic design of our lives and money, therefore the `trust` that we have placed in the regulatory agencies is misplaced trust, and we should have never trusted them in the first place, never should have given people who's interests are clearly not aligned within equality the availability to dictate our lives and decide what food we will be fed, because as it is now seen through/as the increase of diabetes, their interest is money and power, not the lives of the beings that they have had dictatorship over.

Type 2 diabetes is a systemic creation through/as the way that we have accepted and allowed this system of/as our lives to operate. Some do not have the time to exercise throughout the day or can get in very little exercise throughout the day due to the design of money. We are brainwashed to crave certain foods through influences within media, such as a craving for ice cream or a fast food restaurant. For myself, I never considered where and how the thoughts of craving came from and were designed from, which as it turns out is a mechanism of the corporations to keep us buying, keep us wanting, keep us paying for their products. Have a look at a craving for McDonalds. Why is that craving there? Why is it a craving for McDonalds? McDonalds is just an idea, like we don't have a craving for a burger or a soda, it is specifically geared towards McDonalds, I have heard people speak "I want McDonalds", not "I want a burger" and then search through the myriad of options on how to obtain a burger. Or you can consider why corporations are such a large financial backing for the media industry.

So, As we look at the reasons and factors behind of and as type 2 diabetes one can see that it is due to our accepted and allowed structures of our lives based around money. The structure of the system of/as our lives is creating type 2 diabetes. It is imperative then that we implement a system in which life is considered, value of life is considered, quality of life for each being so that type 2 does not become a generational degradation of the human being's quality of life. It is also imperative that we as humans consider the body and consider the foods that the body needs and when the body needs these foods. For instance if one is lacking physical activity within their daily routine it is best to eat vegetables, because when I am not active, especially during the winter, the insulin sensitivity of the body dramatically decreases and I need more insulin to cover an equal amount of food I would eat if it were summer.

The solution here is within and without. It resides within ourselves and resides within an overhaul of the system we are living. It resides within ourselves through making choices of what we eat based on the body, not based on desires, or wants, or cravings. It resides without through not accepting this system as `just the way things are`, and making the changes necessary to the foods that we are provided through corporations and in this making a stand within ourselves to not allow ourselves to accept a system, accept cravings, accept desires that are not based on the quality of life of/as the body/physical substance

Day 5 - Diabetes and Bi-Polarity

It has come to my attention that within diabetes polarities exist. Look at the relationship between ourselves and diabetes, (those of us who are diabetic), and how we must maintain the highs and lows to maintain homeostasis of the blood sugar, that in itself is based on polarities of our consumption of foods. Polarities also exist within the mind in regards to depression, excitement, sadness, happiness, love, hate etc. It is clear that through my participation within these systems (love, hate) that they too affect the polarity of self and will consequently affect the polarity of the blood sugar. Take for instance stress. Most diabetics know and are aware that stress will affect the blood sugar, but stress is caused within the mind. Through taking a grade 12 university biology course, stress affects the livers production of glucagon which breaks down into glucose because of the adrenal glands production of glucocorticoids, and the adrenal glands are active during stress because of the fight or flight response. Now since stress exists only within the mind and has affects on the physical systems of the body it can then be said that depression can, as well, affect the systems of the body, same with love, same with hate, same with anger, same with depression, it is only understanding how, where, and the triggers of said emotions.

What we as diabetics need to see, be aware of, and live responsibility within/as is maintaining homeostasis within the body and within the mind. Homeostasis is the best operating range or state to exist within. If we allow ourselves to become too happy then we are most likely subject to binges, subject to excitatory reactions within the mind and from what I've seen within myself, that is when I can think about consuming large amounts of sugar and essentially say "fuck it, why not, I'm happy" and then I binge out on sugar and more often than not, allow myself to go hyperglycemic. This also relates to sadness wherein I've consumed sugar when I am sad, consumed high caloric foods or high sugar foods to make myself `feel good` - looking at that now it is a fascinating mechanism because the only thing that `feels good` in that moment is taste. Consuming sugar doesn’t allow myself to face what is making myself sad, nor does it make myself not feel sad, it is only used as a mechanism to not face the sadness that I was/am going through and to suppress the sadness. A fascinating thing with sugar is its relationship to happiness and how the human, through parental upbringing, is exposed and systematically influenced to create this relationship between self and sugar. Within this relationship we can see the polarity existent between the relationship of sugar and self and the affects of the polarities of the mind on the polarities of the body regarding homeostasis within blood glucose.

As a child I had this relationship to sugar, where I would want sugar, demand sugar, throw tantrums if I did not get sugar, in order to manifest an experience of being `happy`, most likely because of the sugar high, but with that being said, if I was sad or upset sugar was commonly used as a method to `uplift` my mood in which the relationship between sugar and myself was created - again basing it around the polarities and consistently wanting a high

Diabetics then have a responsibility to maintain our emotions and feelings and to not allow them to be the directive principle of ourselves, although we have already allowed that to happen due to the manifestation of diabetes and the want for highs (happiness and sugar), and our allowance of ourselves to go out and buy and consume something sugary or look for happiness in other places, there is also degeneration of genetics, but sugar and the want for happiness is the catalyst for the disease. In this, and as I am writing this, I see how I am heavily influenced by positivity and attempt to avoid negativity to an nth extent wherein I will consume sugar and use substances that will chemically alter my brain to not have to feel anything other than `good`, but in the laws of polarities, the good must always come with the bad, so therefore within wanting good I am also wanting bad so that I can maintain the experience of going/being high vs a low.

The point of responsibility here sits within our life and how to direct our life and how to give effective care of the body in maintaining homeostasis and if our emotions and feelings are frequently allowing ourselves to compromise our care for ourselves then the emotions must be understood and we must forgive ourselves for becoming subjects to our emotions/wants/feelings and decide to direct ourselves within what is best for our bodies regardless of emotions and feelings and desires. This certainly can be a difficult thing to work within and live responsibility for, but what is nice is that it is left to our choice of what we will accept and allow within ourselves or not, therefore we are the directive principle on how we choose to live our life, and if it is not what is best for all then we only have ourselves to face in the wake of consequence, and only have ourselves to blame in the wake of consequence, therefore need to realize that we are responsible.

The polarities of the mind, for myself, need to be understood and not allowed to influence the body and our ability to take care of the body. I am aware that within consuming sugar, within consuming coffee, consuming cigarettes that I've created a chemical need within the brain and I must, if I am to settle the polarities of myself and the mind, walk through lows within putting an end to the substances that I've abused, and decide to take care of the chemistry of the body and stop fluctuation from highs and lows as best as possible at the moment so that I can gather a strength to direct the mind when/as desires come up so that I am not influenced or directed by them and am able to maintain care for the body.

In the next post I will write out self forgiveness on the relationship to positivity and diabetes.

Sites to check out:

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com

http://eqafe.com

http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

http://heavensjourneytolife.blogspot.com