"I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed diabetes to become a burden on my life, wherein I have created a relationship to testing blood and injecting insulin as a task that I must do every day multiple times a day, as task that is separate from me, a task that I do not want to commit myself to, allowing myself to skip doing this task every once and a while because I would rather act in self-interest that do the testing and maintain the sugar levels that I have to maintain
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see diabetes as a burden which I have to maintain and take care of myself within, in this placing the burden as something that I have to do, instead of standing equal and one to the point and living the will to care for myself as a diabetic the best way possible in being diligent at checking the blood sugar, and doing the injections daily and on time within the routine that works best for me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing that I am a diabetic and that my actions now are going to have consequences later on in my life which will or will not make the point of diabetes `worse` from the perspective of having to deal with other issues related to the lack of care for myself as a diabetic
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live within self-interest still and live a life that is comfortable for only me wherein I live within the fort of my self-interest and create myself as a perceived island, because as a diabetic I will die, from what evidence has been shown, earlier than most in life, and in this not give a fuck about myself as life because I am going to die `anyways` so why not get the most out of energy while I exist here.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live within self-interest, wherein I only consider my desires of what I want in this life, ignoring all of life and ignoring what is in fact happening on this planet to/as life, because I see diabetes as a burden, so I made the conclusion that if I must live with a burden I will attempt to find the desire of desires, not realizing that I in the mind am creating the idea of the burden, and that the idea of the burden is simply not real
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to treat the life that has been given to me like shit shown through the manifestation of/as diabetes wherein I continue to allow myself to live within self-interest even though I have proven to myself that living within self-interest while having diabetes is extremely detrimental to the health of the body because the self-interest that I have defined and lived within is eat what you want, do what you want and in this what I wanted has never been what has been best for the body thus I have treated the life that has been given to me with total disregard, and total abuse
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stand as manifested consequence in this lifetime showing humanity that this is what happens when as we live in self-interest and only consider ourselves and not the equality of life which supports all life, wherein all life here in the physical lives in equality where each part is supporting the whole, wherein diabetes has manifested because I have only considered my desires throughout my life and not the equality that the body has lived within and existed as within/as the physical in which has supported itself in equality in order for life to be maintained, in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to come to this existence and accept this pre-programming where equality of life is not considered wherein each part of existence does its part to support existence, and in this acceptance become a virus to this existence as I have accepted and allowed myself to live in inequality in relation to this world wherein I am not considering the whole and what I as human am a part of the whole and that I have responsibility within/as the whole to do what is best in equality and oneness for/as the whole
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate life because life has supposedly fucked me over with manifesting diabetes, but this hate only comes from the desire to support self-interest in inequality, because the hate stems from having to face the fact that I must let go of self-interest and do what is best for support of the body because I have manifested damage to an organ within the body and I must stand in place for that organ in order to maintain the bodies functionality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard myself as life through ignoring the fact that I have diabetes, ignoring through not checking the blood sugar when I am out nor doing proper insulin when I am out, proper meaning doing insulin for what I eat when I am out and checking the carbohydrates that I am eating when I am out and doing the correct amount of insulin, but in this ignore the fact that I am a diabetic when I feel high, as my hydration depletes and I have to piss a lot, using excuses that I will be fine and that I can manage in this physical discomfort for a while and then check and manage the blood sugar later wherein I am allowing myself to harm myself as life more than what is needed, needed meaning the sugar must go up in the first place and the more meaning not correcting when I first notice that I am dehydrated and pissing a lot.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use diabetes as an excuse to not move my life in the direction that I would like to move it in, but in holding as a burden use it as an excuse to keep the life that is here and accept the life that is here through and as being continuously `put down` wherein I accept the shit that is here because it seems as if I cannot move out of it because it feels like and seems like a burden that lasts forever, not realizing that it is me in and as the relationship that I have developed towards diabetes, being a diabetic that has caused me to look at life this way, in this it is me in relation to life that has allowed me to live this way, thus the creator of all of this burden and `put down` is only but me, in this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to develop a relationship with myself where I am continuously putting myself down and holding myself there until I submit to this world/life/existence instead of allowing myself to develop a relationship with myself in where I support myself as life through and as the actions in which support me as life as a diabetic, in this learning how to develop a relationship with myself as life of how to support what is best for life and commit myself to supporting what is best for life as myself wherein I commit myself to eating in the proper way in which supports the body and blood sugar levels, and in which supports the best insulin sensitivity as well as lifestyle that is best for me as a diabetic, changing the lifestyle from desire and self-interest into what is best for life.
I commit myself to stop seeing diabetes as a burden which I have to cope with but instead see it as an opportunity to understand and live what is best for life in every moment in relation to health, eating and lifestyle,
I commit myself to develop an effective relationship with myself wherein I support myself as life using the tool of/as diabetes to create that relationship wherein I create that relationship to do what is best for me no matter what happens in regard to sugar levels, where I am at in this world, or who I am with, wherein I stay constant and consistent in taking care of myself as life within being a diabetic
I commit myself to show what happens in manifested consequence when one decides to live a life of self-interest and desire, and how it can be avoided by realizing and re-aligning self to the equality of life wherein every being does its part to care for existence to care for life.
I commit myself to stopping the self-interest in that which I have been living and commit myself to taking care of myself as life within/as being life and being a diabetic using myself to investigate what in fact supports the body the best in relation to lifestyle, food intake, exercise, removing all information and knowledge of what food is good and what food is bad, and simply seeing what supports the body the best according to lifestyle and the plethora of variables that life consists of."